Sleep. Work. Play. Repeat.
This is the essence of the majority of people’s day-to-day routine.
Routines. Everyone has them, whether we realize it or not.
Exercise at a certain time of day? Are you showering first in the morning and then breakfast? We all have routines.
There are many advantages for using routines.
1. They help instil good behaviours.
The repeated repetition of doing things that work for us is a great way to establish the habit. Similar to brushing your teeth daily can help keep your teeth clean and improves your overall well-being.
2. They aid in breaking bad habits.
If we recognize that something we’re doing doesn’t help us achieve our goals it is possible to gradually replace bad habits with better ones, by repetition
3. They aid us in becoming more efficient.
If you follow a regular routine, you will improve at certain tasks due to the fact that you do it often. Practice makes perfect.
As routines can help us to stay healthy and reach the goals we set, routines aid in our development as listeners.
Why do you need to implement techniques to improve your listener?
Think of a conversation you’ve had recently.
Talking to someone else is a simple task to complete. Is it? In the listening part of a conversation, many of us struggle to just… pay attention.
Are you aware of HTML0? Have you been caught not paying focus to someone while they’re conversing with you?
TRYING TO MULTI-TASK WHILE HAVING A CONVERSATION MEANS THAT NOTHING IS DONE WELL, INCLUDING LISTENING TO THE OTHER PERSON.
If they ask you questions You say you’re listening, but in truth, you’re listening to those words (well I hope you’re) as you try to keep your mouth shut and aren’t necessarily paying attention to the entire message.
There’s also the case where you seem to be listening but in reality, you’re thinking about the next thing you’re planning to say, and not paying attention to the words actually spoken. If you do decide to reply you’re left wondering why the person you’re talking to does not respond in the manner that you’d expected.
It’s easy to get caught up in the trap of hearing more than being attentive… And it’s easy to fall prey to the urge to interrupt. This isn’t a great habit to establish.
So how do you utilize techniques to become an improved listener?
Consider all the factors that prevent you from listening fully to the message of another person.
Take a look at these questions:
- Which are the physical obstacles?
Do you receive email or telephone notifications?
- Your main distractions to your brain?
Is your to-do list staring at you? Are your looming deadlines hanging over you?
- What are your thoughts?
Have you made assumptions about this person? Do you have preconceived notions regarding the subject of conversation?
Each one of these questions could produce more responses, depending on the situation of your conversation. These three questions are a great starting point. For most conversations, being aware of your mental and physical distractors and assumptions will help you to confront them, which will allow you to concentrate on the purpose of the exchange.
However, I don’t have the time to analyze each time I’m in conversation with a different person.
It’s not necessary to. What you need to do to improve your listening abilities is to recognize distractions that block yours from listening another person. This could mean starting by conscious eliminating the distractions or minimizing interruptions so that you can be attentive to the person you are talking with. You can build on this approach with every conversation.
Here’s how you can use it.
Let’s take a look at the steps (and it is possible to be completed in just a few seconds) in order to assist you to establish a habit that will allow you to be attentive in the course of a conversation.
#1. Scanning the surroundings and then remove or remove any physical obstacles. For instance, you can mute emails or phone messages.
#2. If you’re working make it clear at the start of the conversation have X time. If the other party is aware, they can alter the schedule or make the efforts to work within your deadline.
#3. Consider if you are making assumptions regarding the topic or the other person. The acknowledgment of your assumptions will allow you to become aware of them throughout the conversation. This will make you more aware of your pay attention and be attentive to the person speaking.
If you can reduce the distractions it is possible to take note of the words, as well as the motives behind those words. If you’re in a face to face conversation, pay attention to their body expressions. Does it reinforce the message they’re trying to convey? Or is it trying to tell you something different?
You might be amazed at when you discover the information you gain by paying all your attention to the other person.
As with any other skill being able to actively listen is one which, if mastered can yield rewards for both you along with your group.
As with any art, it must be practised.
Set it as a habit to prepare yourself to be able to listen.
- Routines help you to develop good listening habits.
- Before you start your discussion:
- Check your surroundings for distractions
- Take care of your mental distractions
- Be aware of your assumptions
- Awareness helps you to be more attentive and listener.
A routine can help you develop the habit of listening, help break bad listening habits, and aid you become a better and adept speaker.